Rules for the Non-Military (Make sure you read #13 twice)
Dear Civilians, we know that the current state of affairs in our great nation has many civilians up in arms and excited to join the military. For those of you who can’t join, you can still lend a hand. Here are a few of the areas where we would like your assistance:
1. The next time you see any adults talking (or wearing a hat) during the playing of the National Anthem, feel free to kick their ass.
2. When you witness, firsthand, someone burning the American Flag in protest, feel free to kick their ass.
3. Regardless of the rank they held while they served, pay the highest amount of respect to all veterans. If you see anyone doing otherwise, quietly pull them aside and explain how these veterans fought for the very freedom they bask in every second of their pathetic existence. Enlighten them on the many sacrifices these veterans have made to make this Nation great. Then hold them down while a disabled veteran kicks their ass.
4. If you were never in the military, DO NOT pretend that you were. Wearing battle dress uniforms ( BDUs ) or Jungle Fatigues, telling others that you used to be ‘Special Forces’. Collecting GI Joe memorabilia might have been okay when you were seven years old, but now it will only make you look stupid and you need to have your ass kicked, twice.
5. Next time you come across an Air Force member, do not ask them, ‘Do you fly a jet?’ Not everyone in the Air Force is a pilot, some of us worked for a living. Such ignorance deserves an ass kicking right away. (children are exempt).
6. If you witness someone calling the Coast Guard ‘non-military’, inform them of their mistake – and then feel free to kick their ass.
7. Next time Old Glory (the US flag) prances by during a parade, get on your damn feet and pay homage to her by placing your hand over your heart and removing your hat you have in backwards. This includes arrogant politicians who think someone may be offended. Quietly thank the military member or veteran lucky enough to be carrying her – of course, failure to do either of those will earn you a severe ass-kicking.
9. ‘Your mama wears combat boots’ never made sense to me – stop saying it! If she did, she would most likely be a vet and therefore will and should kick your ass!
10. ‘Flyboy’ (Air Force), ‘Jarhead’ (Marines), ‘Grunt’ (Army), ‘Squid’ (Navy), ‘Puddle Jumpers'(Coast Guard), Bubblehead ( Sub sailor ), etc., are terms of endearment we use describing each other. Unless you are a service member or vet , you have not earned the right to use them. Using these terms by non-military will get your ass kicked.
11. Last, but not least, whether or not you become a member of the military, please support our troops and their families. Every holiday that you enjoy with family and friends, please remember that there are literally thousands of soldiers, sailors, marines and airmen far from home wishing they could be with their families. Thank our military and veterans for the sacrifices they make every day. Without them, our country would get its ass kicked.
12. It’s the Veteran, not the reporter, who has given us the freedom of the press. It’s the Veteran, not the poet, who has given us the freedom of speech. It’s the Veteran, not the community organizer , who gives us the freedom to demonstrate. It’s the Military who salutes the flag, who serves beneath the flag, and whose coffin is draped by the flag, who allows the protester to burn the flag instead of kicking your ass.
Oh, AND ONE MORE:
13. If you ever hear anyone singing the national anthem in any languages other than English, run up to them, don’t walk, and start KICKING THEIR ASS.
ONE LAST THING:
Feel free, with my gracious permission, to share this message on your blog, your website, and throughout your social media outlets, so it can be shared and the message can be heard over, and over, and over.
WE LIVE IN THE LAND OF THE FREE, ONLY BECAUSE OF THE BRAVE!
If you don’t stand behind our troops, PLEASE feel free to stand in front of them!
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