Best Friend Or Worst Nightmare

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I’m home alone, bored, and decided I wasn’t done talking in my last post about my wife’s big question. But wait, there’s more. Have you ever just bumbled around the house, bored, nothing really to do? I sat down this morning to write my other post, a tedious event since I do it on my phone, while I was deleting some music and downloading more, yes, I always want more music. But as I got a slab of meat ready for the smoker I wondered what I was going to be doing next. I already ran my errands and knocked that shit out. I realized while writing the last post that over the years as I’ve aged I have changed, both mentally, physically, and emotionally. Not that I miss my youth, but I do appreciate it now where I didn’t then. We all, I guess we all do, find a path in life and pretty much stick to it, mostly out of habit I think. Some call it a “routine”, I call it what it really is, and that’s a habit. Life happens, shit happens, and we roll with it or get rolled over by it.

I’m a pretty relaxed person, some say to relaxed, and I tend to roll with the punches instead of getting into the fight. I realized recently that I have become an asshole to people I don’t know and to those I wish I didn’t know. I suppose this happened over time and becomes more evident the more I get out in public. Seems like every time I open the front door I hear ” welcome to Walmart motherfucker” simply because in the course of my day I will inevitably be forced to interact with people, strangers, other people’s children, and people who definitely should not breed, ever, there dads should have had the common courtesy to just pull out. But noooooooooo, now people with common sense have to deal with your fucking problems because they never did. Anyway, this has nothing to do with the people of Walmart nor is it me thinking I’m better than others, it goes deeper, I’m the problem. I admit it, I’m the problem, or I’m the one with the problem. People are needy little fuckers that just suck the everloving life right out of me. There are many qualities I despise in people, the top two are being lazy and being a liar.

My wife says I have a strange gift, my ability to watch people, read people, and get just shy to understanding them before a word is ever spoken. You’re right, it sounds like I judge them before knowing them. Or I just don’t have time for bullshit and I just cut to the chase. I don’t want my son turning into me, he has a kind a loving heart that never stops giving. The world needs more people just like him, that is of course my biased opinion. I have a crude way I look at life in general, not that I’m special and I’m not the only one life has fucked without any lube, I just learned from it. I don’t want to be a repeat offender at the mercy of others to decide my fate which is decided with a thumbs up or thumbs down. Life has snuck in her fair share of surprises but looky here bitch…… I’m still standing. In people’s defense, I know I don’t give them a fair shake. Honestly, I see no reason to trust a person who has not earned my trust first. Maybe living in the big city has tainted me. I see what Christians call the “7 Deadly Sins” in almost every person I meet or know. No, I’m not perfect, far from perfect, but I do pay attention and I do have a considerable amount of common sense. I learned, and try to explain, the value of one’s life, it only holds value to yourself, only you value you. I spent a considerable amount of my life trying (and failing) to please others to feel as though I have self worth, something frowned upon by Christians, well Catholics, and it took some hard knocks to the head that made me realize I’m more than just a cog in a machine, my life matters to me, and that is what is important.

Getting divorced, divorcing the Air Force, and getting disowned by my family (parents and sisters) all within a few months of each other does wonders for my self esteem. However, I got mad and I stood the fuck back up, giving life the two finger salute she deserved and I got over it. Fuck it. Divorced? Yes, she needed other men in her life, I didn’t want to share. Over, 13 years in the toilet. The Air Force divorced me, I was no longer fit to perform. Over, 12 years in the toilet. My family, with exception to my mother, disowned me after the found out I was not only looking for my biological parents, but was in communication with my biological mother and the family of my biological father since he was already dead. Want to know more, search this blog, I’ve written extensively about being adopted. In their eyes I was wrong for wanting to where I came from. But, slowly, I got them to understand. Now, we all have a pretty nice relationship, except my oldest sister (also adopted) who still despises me all these years later. Fuck, I just wanted to know where I came from and why I was discarded. Anyway, as I said, I got mad, packing, and off to live my life on my terms.

But, damn, my future wife had (and still does) an ass that commanded my full attention. Women, eventhough they’ll never admit it, are tricky crafty creatures, they play coy but know they are the black widow. One can search the blog for more on her as well. I have a favorite story I’m going to share with y’all, which in my opinion sums up people’s selfishness and how self preservation is more often than not compromised because of being closed minded. The moral of the story you ask; don’t tempt fate.

One day, a scorpion was walking around on a riverbank wondering how to get to the opposite bank. He saw a crocodile basking in the sun. The scorpion went up to the crocodile and said “Crocodile, can I please ride on your back across the river?” The crocodile was taken aback with this said. “Why would I do that? When i am swimming, you will sting me, and I will die,” The crocodile said. “Well, if i sting you, you will sink, and i will drown, for I cannot swim,” the scorpion said. With that, the scorpion climbed on the crocodile’s back, and the crocodile swam across the river. In the middle of the river, the scorpion stung the crocodile. “Why? Why would you do that scorpion!? You too will die now! Why!?” “Because… it is in my nature,” the scorpion replied sadly, and with that, they both sank deep into the water.

I don’t recall where I read or heard this story years ago, but as I aged many things rang true in the story if you relate it to the people in your life. Everyone wants to trust everyone all the time while not being worthy of being trusted. Or let me say that in modern terms, we all want full disclosure but are not willing to provide full disclosure in return. With that being said, y’all can think how you will think, its not my choice. But, I do have trust issues outside of my immediate family, for two reasons, in my opinion, two damn great reasons. The two reasons I don’t trust people are because I don’t know them and becomes I do know them. Simple, right? My wife will tell you I trust only a few because it is part of who I am, part of being a Scorpio (either the best friend or the worst enemy), and partly because of fear. My lack of trust, I suppose, has many contributing factors, gathered throughout my life, and resulting in the current me. She tells me that she likes the fact that I write on my blog, she thinks I need to write a book full of the stories I tell here as well as ones in my private life. I tell her just like I tell y’all, this is just a place for me to “talk”. I don’t consider myself a person who writes, I consider myself a person who likes to share stories, I like it here, I share things I like here, I don’t want it to become ” work”, besides, it’s fun this way for me.

I will never see a day without sheeple being herded into conformity. I don’t want to be one of the sheeple. I’m only sure about one thing in my life, one day I will die, but life will continue for the living. I think on that note I will close this out, I expected it to gradually go somewhere but as we see it never really formed into anything. Like I said, I just wanted to talk. I do know one thing tho, the only alternative to being my friend or enemy is not to exist in my world. But, that would be allot like having a cake and eating it alone.

Honey, I Found My Birthday Present

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Resembling the artistry of some beautiful alien technology, the new Emperor 1510 workstation from Novelquest has the shape of a bad-ass scorpion. I was looking for something else and stumbled across this bad-ass chair @ dudeIwantthat.com and I have decided that I want it. Obviously I’m still unemployed so anyone wanting to take a hit for the team can feel free to hook me up! All text, information, and pictures were borrowed from the above mentioned website without permission, but damn, I just needed to share it.

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The pinnacle of functionality and comfort and it looks like a scorpion! At nearly $6,000, the Emperor 1510 workstation may require a CEO-sized wallet for purchase, but given that owning one may actually make me want to work 120-hour weeks…or at least 20-hour weeks…which would still be 4 times more than the 5-hour weeks I currently log…I’d probably recoup my costs within…I don’t know, someone who’s good at math story problems figure out the specifics. It wouldn’t be very long and the initial investment would be worth it is my point. Because once I had the hybrid chair paid for, I would obviously redirect my efforts to contribute to the rat race to more important endeavors, such as using the Emperor as an aid and prop in becoming the next Dr. Claw.

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In addition to its ergonomic design and all-inclusive, compact work space setup, the Emperor 1510 features:

  • A Handmade Canadian Steel Frame. 3/16″ thick steel with a powder coating finish.Monitor Mounts. Allows for the installation of a single monitor of up to 30″, or triple monitor setups of 24″ apiece.
  • Upper & Lower Section Lifting/Lowering Capabilities. Emperor electronics allow users to set their perfect screen and keyboard height combinations, as well as tilt backwards up to 25 degrees to help relieve back pressure. Seat and leg rests also adjust.
  • LED Lighting. Multiple LEDs are positioned on the upper section of the structure to output sufficient lighting without generating a glare across computer monitors.
  • Connectivity. Supports Mac, PC, or game consoles using an assortment of built-in inputs and outputs. Also includes headphone jacks and a port for a second audio source, such as an MP3 player.
  • Sound System. Includes Bose multimedia speakers and under seat Acoustimass for stereo performance. Music, movies, and games play in deep, clear surround sound for you and you alone. Because sharing is for suckers.

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Brave Enough For Scorpion Vodka?

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So you think you’re brave enough?

This bottle of vodka contains an actual fully edible Scorpion. This is not for the faint hearted. If you think you can handle this then treat yourself or treat a friend to this interesting gift.

As well as it’s novelty factor, the eight-legged lush in each bottle has other benefits. No, really. For starters it’s guaranteed to scare any would-be booze bandits. Alcohol infused with a scorpion is said to remove toxins from the body when consumed, a little like a mini detox program. What’s more, it imparts a soft, woody taste to the vodka and smooths off its sharp edge.

Now all you need to worry about is who has to eat it? Get yours today!

Features:

The vodka contains a farm-raised scorpion that is 100% safe to eat.The scorpion is a Buthus Martensi scorpion infused in pure grain vodka.The vodka is perfect for serving neat or with a mixer.The vodka imparts a smoothness in the vodka

 Measurements:

37.5% Vol 70ml bottle

Please note:

The scorpion may contain sharp parts consume with caution.

Please drink responsibly.

Posted From Scorpion Sting’s Motorola Droid Maxx!

Cobra Snake & Scorpion Whiskey

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Cobra Snake & Scorpion Whiskey
300ml 37%v/v (74 proof)
(Cobra snake with scorpion in its mouth)

Bored with drinking the Tequila worm? Didn’t see the Green Fairy while enjoying your Absinthe? Want to explore the next level of forbidden alcoholic pleasures? It’s time to face your fears and experience Vietnamese Real Cobra Snake & Scorpion Whiskey. Inside this rather exotic and rare bottle of whiskey holds a real Cobra snake with a scorpion in its mouth forever infusing a unique flavor into the whiskey. Do you dare take the shot? Would you eat the snake or the scorpion?

This special whiskey is infused with a real farm raised Cobra snake, black scorpion, ginseng roots and herbal seed pods. The whiskey is steeped for several months, which then imparts a unique flavour into the whiskey, it is quite an acquired taste. The story is that this is used in SE Asia as a very strong aphrodisiac. It is also said that it has many medical uses, such as the treatment of back and muscle pain. Every bottle is unique in its own way so therefore the item purchased may differ slightly in looks but not size.

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Posted From Scorpion Sting’s Motorola Droid Maxx!