A Brief History Of Three Great Words

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As always, members of The Scorpion Army are up early finding things which normally would go unseen or unread. Today’s presentation briefly delves deep into the history of Fuck, Shit, and Cunt, three of my favorite four-letter words that have an intriguing and very fascinating history. Rather than being written in manuscripts by monks, we find them used by normal people and preserved in surprising places like place names, personal names, and animal names and they reveal more about our medieval past than just attitudes towards sex and body parts.

Fuck

Fuck isn’t thought to have existed in English before the fifteenth century and possibly arrived later from German or Dutch. In fact, the Oxford English Dictionary says it wasn’t used until 1500. Using place names though, we can trace it back a bit earlier.

Many early instances of fuck were actually used to mean “to strike” rather than being anything to do with actual fucking. The more common Middle English word for sex wasswive, which has developed nicely into the Modern English word swivel, as in: go swivel on it. Some of the earliest instances of fuck then, turn out to mean “hitting” or “striking,” such as Simon Fuckebotere (recorded in 1290), who was disappointingly probably in the milk industry, hitting butter rather than doing anything else with it, or Henry Fuckebeggar (1286/7) who may have, unfortunately, hit the poor.

The earliest examples of fuck in English appear in place names. The first is found near Sherwood in 1287: Ric Wyndfuk and Ric Wyndfuck de Wodehous. These both feature a kestrel known as the Windfucker which, we must assume, went at the wind. The next definite example comes from Bristol 1373 in Fockynggroue, which may have been named for a grove where couples went for some quiet alone time.

Shit

Like fuckshit has a rich history, being used across the Germanic and Scandinavian languages, making it one of our oldest words. It originally had a technical usage, meaning diarrhoea in cattle, and it crops up in lots of place names from a time when people were herding cattle and naming things, such as Schitebroc—now Skidbrook—which literally means “shit-stream,” found in the Domesday Book for Lincolnshire.

Shit did not just happen in the countryside though. Street-names, for example, reflect the grotty state of urban living in graphic detail. Schiteburne Lane—now Sherbourn Lane in London—means “shit-stream lane,” and Schiteburg Lane in Romford uses borough in the middle, meaning a fortress, to paint a vivid picture of a privy, standing proud as a mockery of a palace in the middle of town.

Cunt

This too is an old word, appearing across the Germanic and Scandinavian languages, although any connection to the Latin cunnusis unlikely, despite the apparent similarity. Originally, rather than being a taboo word, it was the general descriptive term for the vagina. Cunt is, etymologically, more feminist than vagina, which is dependent on the penis for its definition, coming from the Latin for “sword sheath.”

Records of cunt start comparatively early. There’s a runic inscription which reads ‘kunt,’ but that was probably a spelling mistake. Nearly all of the early evidence comes from place names and even personal names—pity, or perhaps applaud, Bele Wydecunthe in 1328, for example.

The most famous of the place names is Gropecunt Lane which at one point appeared in twenty places, generally describing—with pleasing matter-of-factness—a red light district. These have all since been lost, or have been changed to Grape Lane, but all are still easily traced.

But other place names are no less revealing.

Shavecuntewelle in Kent in 1275, for example, could describe a nearby valley with a narrow wooded area—a literal lady-garden, if you will—or it could be a site where women were punished. Cuntewellewang in Lincolnshire (1317) seems to describe a similar type of landscape.

And the thirteenth-century Hardecunt? Who knows, it’s just a great name.

Perhaps the most glorious example of cunt in a place name is Hungery Cunt, found in a 1750 military map of Kinross-shire, Scotland. Disappointingly, though, this is probably just a mistake: a misreading of Hungeremout.

These early instances of now heavily taboo words open up the world of normal people in medieval England and a different—and more vibrant—picture of the history of our language. They allow us to meet a very literal and pragmatic people with a healthy sense of humour about their bodies and their environment.

What You Don’t Know Others Know

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I thought today would be a good day to tell about the adventure of a certain somebody who was living a really secret life that she thought was under very tight wraps. Eventhough she travels in between a few different social circles each day she never had a fear that others might venture out of their own circles and unbalance her own. At first she was in shock but soon came to realize that it was bound to happen sooner or later. After a discussion with a stripper known as Jewel a few years ago I found out quite a not about her without really trying. She has a day job as a receptionist, she has a husband, she has two sons, she is the vice president of an elementary school PTA, she is on the luncheon committee at the baptist church her and her family attend, and she is a stripper at least 3 nights a week. Each one of those groups form a circle which she belongs to, some overlap and others never seem to. Fast forward to earlier this week when we spoke again, only this time one circle expanded into her secret circle, it expanded into to the circle of Jewel.

A few weekends ago she was assigned to cater very closely to a bachelors party that would have roughly fifteen people in attendance. Eventhough it was on a night she didn’t normally work she accepts it because it would mean some extra cash that van be used when they head to Florida for summer vacation in July. Lucky for her getting out of the house was rather easy since her husband was out of town and both boys were at friends overnight. When she got to the club she was about an hour early so she took her time getting dressed, doing make up, and finishing her hair. When she was done she headed out to the bar to get a bottled water where she sat a while watching everyone else. What she would soon find out is she was being watched right back. Come right before ten or so she headed into the private meeting room where the bachelors party would be and as she was walking by this man she realized she recognized him. She blew it off because she didn’t know where from and kept walking.

Soon enough the room began to fill with party goers, the mobile bartender, two other strippers, and the guest of honor. Everyone was set, it was time to get the party started. Jewel has noticed the man she made eye contact with outside is in the room as one of the guests attending. She just had an odd feeling about it the whole night, she couldn’t shake it or figure out where he was from. As the night drew to a close, some 4 hours later, Jewel was on the stage doing what Jewel does, making a bunch of money. Part of the way into song number two, now she is completely nude, she sees the man up close, as he is handing her a tip he pauses a moment, and then get worst nightmare came true, he called her by her real name and asked if she was glad the night was over because she looked beat. This shook her for a second, but nlrw him off acting as if she never heard him talking, much less saying her real name. As soon as the song is over she quickly, yet politely, left the room. But before she got to the curtain she heard the man say he looks forward to seeing everyone in church on Sunday. Not missing a beat she eased through the curtain to the back hall. Now, she began to panic, now she knew who he was, and now she knows how he knows her and her family.

She tried not to think about any of it on her drive home. She thought it might be a good time to sit her husband down and have a long uncomfortable talk about what sh does on the side. But how? She then decides to wait, wait until Sunday and see how that goes. Maybe, just maybe, she will get lucky. Why wouldn’t she, she has never done anything to the man to make him act vindictively towards her, has she. Sunday came and went, church came and went, the picnic afterwards came and went, and she never even saw the man from the club. After that day she never looked back again, but if you didn’t see her performance on Wednesday then you’ll have missed out because she ended her stripping career that night. She figured she has beaten the odds long enough and it was time to put her pole dancing skills to rest.