Why So Fucking Serious?


If you ever want trouble, come between an addict and her coffee. If you ever want to witness a coffee meltdown, fuck up my wife’s order at the local coffee chain outlet near our home. Oh yes, it happened, and I write today to maybe help myself understand why coffee zombies, my wife included,  go from zero to ballistic in .000001 seconds when their overpriced coffee crack is not prepared in a manner of perfection fitting for their standards. But, before I tell you a little story, let me just re-address the fact that there are a handful of places I absolutely refuse to go because I can’t fucking stand the mere thought of going inside. I don’t go with my wife or for my wife, hell no, fuck that shit, the people that work in these places are fucking rude, anal, and have lost their damn minds. I tend not to promote things or places I detest, so we not say the names of a national chain of make-up stores, the mall, or the national chain of coffee stores be written about today. Y’all are smart, figure it out. Let’s just say I have almost been divorced twice for my refusal to enter particular places of business.

Anyway, my wife has a ritual, on paydays each month, she pays the coffee monsters big bucks so her cravings can be satisfied. This means she gets high dollar coffee crack four times a month and on other special occasions. The rest of the month she fakes it with the little brew cups and different flavoured creamers. So, I get looking forward to something. We all have things we like and look forward to having, but coffee drinkers are fucking different, very different. I know the week is drawing to a close because her claws and fangs become more pronounced. So, let me explain what almost sparked the spring skirmish of 2017.

Yesterday my wife is on her way to work, making the ritual pitstop to get her blah blah blah mocha fucked up size name coffee. After waiting behind 12 or so cars she tells the speaker box the kind of coffee she wants. She says it in a fashion to which one would believe he is witnessing a line from a foreign film being spoken. It’s almost erotic in a way, especially coming from a person who lives in southeast Texas and can neither speak or understood one word in Spanish. Needless to say, after money has exchanged hands and she goes to take her first sip, it the wrong coffee. These fools have given her a cup of coffee with another person’s name written on the side. Bastards! How dare they do this inconsiderate and uncaring thing to her. Instantaneously​ mad now, she wants the blood, the balls, and this motherfucker’s first born for this fuck up. The nerve!

Of course this has to be resolved in a lady like, very polite manner, and she is in such a big hurry that she returns to the line of cars which is twice as long now. It’s the principal I’m told, she should not have to go inside to unfuck their overpriced coffee mistake. I’m, okay then. Here’s the kicker, when she finally arrived at the window, the spoiled little cunt sees the cup with my wife’s name on it sitting there all lonely and actually tried to hand it to her. How dare this bitch try to give her a coffee that was carefully crafted a mere 23 minutes ago, I mean, really bitch? All sarcasm aside, that girl is lucky their hands never touched because my wife would have dragged her out of the little window and gave her a stern talking to. Now a manager has arrived on scene to diffuse the “altercation”. She solves this entire thing buy re-making her coffee, up-sizing it for her, even adding sprinkles and whipped cream, and the refunding her $6 plus dollars. To top it off, since she knows my wife is a long time loyal patron, she gives he a gift card in equivalence to 30 days of free coffee made in the manner she prefers. That’s the equivalent to just shy of a $200 value for those of y’all counting at home.

So, it’s all been taken care of, right? Wrong! Why? Because I get to hear about the whole fucking thing for a second time once she got home. Also, had to listen to her talk and angry text on her phone the rest of the night. Now, I know it seems as though I am petty and don’t care about her problems, but it’s just fucking coffee. Don’t ever try to tell a coffee person it’s just “coffee” and expect to survive. Now I get to fight with my wife because I failed to take all of this bullshit serious one little bit. Oh, trust me when I tell y’all that it has escalated beyond an “I’m sorry” at this point, there may be big trouble brewing now. I know I’m a bastard for not taking this seriously, but how can I?

The image above was borrowed from the internet, a Google search more specifically, and do not have permission to use it today, tomorrow, or any other day. Oddly enough, I Googled “coffee zombie” and it was one of the results. I liked the look and decided to use it. If it belongs to you and you can prove it in writing I will gladly give you credit or remove it upon your request.


The Land Of The (used to be) Free


WARNING: if you are not a passionate American DO NOT read this, as it may cause severe anxiety, but if you are a passionate American who loves and cares for America, you are dared to read everything below. If your eyes have been open then most of this list will be a reminder that we the people have long since been free.

What follows are simple statements of reality, NOT what could be, because in the last few years there has been a paradigm shift in America away from a Republic to a full blown dictatorship with more power being consolidated into the hands of a single individual than any American would have ever believed! So please read, and I invite one and all to challenge yourselves to look around, see the changes, and ask yourself and others, WTF.

What follows is a list of rights and freedoms we can now, by law or by executive order, be denied in the land of the (used to be) free, and circumstances that prevail for the powers that be to enforce this madness. It is not an all-inclusive list, but enough to scare the crap out of any Americans wanting to know what the fuck happened while they were sleeping.

You now have lost your right to assembly through HR 374, giving government the ability to arrest and bring felony charges to anyone engaged in political protests anywhere in the USA! Passed by Congress!

You now have lost your right to free speech through HR 374, giving government the ability to arrest and bring felony charges to anyone engaged in verbal or written political protests anywhere in the USA! Passed by Congress!

The president no longer requires the Senate to approve his Tzars, and can appoint any crony or political ally to any high-ranking government office, with impunity from congressional checks and balances with the passage of S 679. This will allow him to consolidate powers not before even considered due to the relationships he may have with these appointed individuals! Passed By congress!

You no longer have the right to due process in any way, shape, or form if our president or his appointed government officials declare you an enemy of the state through the NDAA rider. There is no longer the requirement for the burden of proof, as you have no due process and can be locked away indefinitely, without the prospects of a trial. Passed by congress!

You can now be targeted for assassination, as an American, by the president or his appointed representatives if for any reason you are deemed an enemy of the state and there again is no burden of proof, and no requirement for due process! Passed by presidential executive order!

The president has made law his power to declare a national emergency, defined by him, and may take over all communications within in the USA, both public and private, for a period of time to be determined by him! Passed by presidential executive order!

The president made law his power to declare Martial law in an emergency, defined by him, with the ability to confiscate all properties, both public and private, including farms and livestock, and force citizens into labor to support this agenda! Passed by presidential executive order!

The government has bought, paid for and staffed over 800 internment centers, built under contract by Halliburton industries, strategically placed around the country, and capable of holding hundreds of thousands of Americans for forced reeducation and relocation purposes, without due process and for an indefinite period of time as detailed in DOD report FM 3-39.40.

Your right to reasonable privacy is gone as, through the patriot act, government agencies may spy on you and collect your personal data with legal impunity, whether it be through social media, phone conversations, internet searches, street lights or high flying drones! You will never be truly alone again in your life!

The government is actively hiring tens of thousands of goons and thugs from the dregs of society to man an internal army called by their soft names, the TSA and Homeland Security. These troops will be armed as well as the best combat troops we send abroad to fight our illegal, imperialistic wars, including battle-proven automatic weapons, hundreds of millions of .40 caliber hollow point rounds (only meant to kill), body armor, armored vehicles and, of course, aerial surveillance! They are currently being stationed across the country at strategic locations such as airports, train and bus stations, shopping malls, checkpoints on major highways and even sports events. So, basically, in any place there is significant gathering or the flow of population!

The Military is in the process of training as many as 40,000 returning soldiers in crowd control and riot termination to be used to augment the internal forces mentioned above, even though this is in direct violation of the constitution, which clearly states the standing army is to be used for foreign conflicts and not against the American people!

Now this list, as short as it is only shows the surface of the preparations being made to enslave and subjugate the American population. Are you fucking angry yet? Are you comfortable with the changes?

The struggle for liberty may cost you a lot, BUT, doing nothing WILL cost you EVERYTHING else you hold near and dear.

Please remember, as bleak as this seems, there is hope, because regardless of their power and preparation, the most powerful force in this country has always been and still remains the 321+ million Americans. Together we constitute an unstoppable force that cannot be silenced. But, you the individual has to want your Country back, until then, everyone remains fucked without lubrication.